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September 20, 2007

Travel calculus

by Dana

Hoo boy, do I hate packing.  I travel a lot, so I’m reasonably good at it, but I’m not a fan.  For one thing, as you may remember from my blog about my “battle bag,” I am not a devil-may-care kind of person.  Like the Coast Guard—or was it Amelia Peabody?—my motto is Semper Paratus:  if I can imagine it might happen, it gets worked into the packing calculus. 

If it’s just a conference, or an overnight trip, no problem.  I have lists built in to my computer for that, and then it’s just a matter of making sure I get the dry cleaning done.  If it’s fieldwork, there’s a certain amount of muscle-memory dedicated to that (field toolkit, bag for clothes, backpack for computer, books, etc.), though that doesn’t happen much any more.  But if it’s a combination of several events— research, book tour, visit to friends—and it also includes travel with my husband, who will not necessarily be doing everything I am, it starts getting complicated.  Mathematical.  Like this:

((Mystery Convention + vacation + research) + (mystery convention + vacation)/ 2(checked bags) + 2(carry-on bags)/ 2 - TSA regulations) * 1 week…

Where “Mystery Convention” = (banquet + signings + notes) and “vacation”  = outdoors (and not beach) + cold weather and “research” = camera + notebook + pens and “mystery convention” = banquet only and “checked bag” <50lbs and “carry-on” contains < 1 baggie of liquids and gels and “1 week” may or may not = laundry…

You see what I mean.  I’m not packing for my husband, but since we share suitcase space, he does enter into the equation.

I really should lighten up.  Most of the time, where I’m going, anything I forget I can find, borrow, buy, or do without.  Most of the time all of this is just me trying to impose order on my world, and I’d be better off chilling.  I know guys who’ve gone to academic conferences with nothing but the clothes on their back, a clean shirt, a slide set, toothbrush, and two pairs of underpants in a paper bag, and they did just fine.  It’s just not me.

It’s all a small price to pay, this mania.  Once I’m out the door, alea jacta est, and I can relax.  It’s all worth the effort.  I can start enjoying the trip, the sights I'll see, the people I'll meet because I’ve already done the math.

See you in Anchorage!

Travel calculus

Hoo boy, do I hate packing.  I travel a lot, so I’m reasonably good at it, but I’m not a fan.  For one thing, as you may remember from my blog about my “battle bag,” I am not a devil-may-care kind of person.  Like the Coast Guard—or was it Amelia Peabody?—my motto is Semper Paratus:  if I can imagine it might happen, it gets worked into the packing calculus. 

If it’s just a conference, or an overnight trip, no problem.  I have lists built in to my computer for that, and then it’s just a matter of making sure I get the dry cleaning done.  If it’s fieldwork, there’s a certain amount of muscle-memory dedicated to that (field toolkit, bag for clothes, backpack for computer, books, etc.), though that doesn’t happen much any more.  But if it’s a combination of several events— research, book tour, visit to friends—and it also includes travel with my husband, who will not necessarily be doing everything I am, it starts getting complicated.  Mathematical.  Like this:

((Mystery Convention + vacation + research) + (mystery convention + vacation)/ 2(checked bags) + 2(carry-on bags)/ 2 - TSA regulations) * 1 week…

where “Mystery Convention” = (banquet + signings + notes) and “vacation”  = outdoors (and not beach) + cold weather and “research” = camera + notebook + pens and “mystery convention” = banquet only and “checked bag” <50lbs and “carry-on” contains < 1 baggie of liquids and gels and “1 week” may or may not = laundry…

You see what I mean.  I’m not packing for my husband, but since we share suitcase space, he does enter into the equation.

I really should lighten up.  Most of the time, where I’m going, anything I forget I can find, borrow, or buy.  Most of the time all of this is just me trying to impose order on my world, and I’d be better off chilling out.  I know guys who’ve gone to academic conferences with nothing but the clothes on their back, a clean shirt, a slide set, toothbrush, and two pairs of underpants in a paper bag, and they did just fine.  It’s just not me.

It’s all a small price to pay, this mania.  Once I’m out the door, alea jacta est, and I relax.  It’s all worth the effort.  I can start enjoying the trip.  I’ve already done the math.

See you in Anchorage!

September 16, 2007

Counting Blessings

by Mary

A big congratulations to our New York Times Bestseller Femmes! In case anyone hasn't heard, our very own Charlaine Harris and Toni Kelner, editors of the new anthology MANY BLOODY RETURNS, hit the big time right out of the box by entering at #30 on the NYT list. Elaine Viets hit it with them since one of her stories is included in the collection. Outstanding, ladies!

And what could possibly be better than that? How about not one, but TWO nominations for Anthony Awards. That would be Dana. Yes, Femme Dana Cameron is right up there too, spiraling ever higher with her book ASHES AND BONES nominated for Best Paperback Original Novel and her story THE LORDS OF MISRULE nominated for Best Short Story. This is huge! The Anthonys are the awards given by attendees of Bouchercon, the World Mystery Convention. Congratulations, Dana, on such a tremendous accomplishment.

But wait, that's not all. Along with Dana, Toni and Elaine are also Anthony nominees this year in the short story category. Mercy, that's a whole lot of good luck. And hard work. Charlaine, Toni, Elaine, and Dana, I hope you've all given yourselves extra special treats with such good news.

Writers know that major events like these are rare. That's why we are world-class celebrators. We know to celebrate everything, no matter how small. Got a deal on copy paper? You got your twenty-third rejection, but it was a 'nice' rejection? Hey, break out the champagne! The next letter might be an acceptance! See Toni's blog on Waiting and Celebrating for more writer treat ideas.

Here is a photo I love that shows the appreciation of a small blessing. This is Tarra, one of the residents of the Elephant Sanctuary here in Tennessee. One of the sanctuary workers noticed Tarra standing very still for a long time by the fence. When he went over to see if she was okay, here is what he found.

Baby_and_tarra2_4 A baby bird had flown down to say hello. Tarra was mesmerized. I love the wonder and joy in her eye as she appreciates the moment, every muscle stilled, concentrating on the little bird who wasn't the least afraid of an elephant. We can't see Tarra's mouth, but I bet she is smiling.

I had two similar moments myself recently. I saw a fawn close-up, and for the first time in my life, I saw a beautiful red fox at the edge of the woods. Small blessings? Not to me. Remembering that the world is still full of wonders, that every day that we are here is precious and is to be treasured, these aren't small things.

Celebrate whatever your day brings, every day, whether it's a little bird or a big honking major nomination or New York Times bestseller slot. They're all great blessings.   

September 13, 2007

Making the List, or What I Want on My Tombstone

by Toni L.P. Kelner

Many wonderful writers won't come within spitting distance of the New York Times Best Seller list. In fact, I'd say that most wonderful writers don't. Certainly the majority of my favorites haven't and never will.

It's an arbitrary and arcane list, and nobody knows how the books are weighted or exactly how it works. Well, presumably the people at the New York Times know, but they aren't telling. Making the list requires selling a lot of books at once rather than making steady sales over time. In Hollywood, they talk about a movie "opening" or making it big the first weekend. It's the same deal with books, only they give us a week.

Despite the oddities and odds against it happening, making the list is something writers dream of. And somehow, yesterday I found myself on that list. Many Bloody Returns, the vampire anthology I co-edited with Charlaine Harris, debuted at #30 on the NYT list.

It is one of the biggest things ever to happen to me as a writer. I've been joking that the proud title of "NYT Best Selling Author" will now go on every one of my book covers, stamped across every author bio I produce, and at the bottom of every e-mail I ever send. Chances are that it'll make it onto my tombstone.

I cannot tell you how excited I am about this. I'm really, really happy. Disgustingly happy. And you know what makes me happiest? No, not the tombstone part, though that's right on up there. It's knowing that I'm not on the list alone. I've got a dozen terrific writers who are in the book with me:

Kelley Armstrong
Jim Butcher
Rachel Caine
Bill Crider
P. N. Elrod
Christopher Golden
Carolyn Haines
Tate Hallaway
Charlaine Harris
Tanya Huff
Jeanne C. Stein
Elaine Viets

What a crew to be associated with! We've got writers like Charlaine, Kelley, and Jim who are already familiar names on the NYT list, and for good reason. We've got award-winning mystery writers like Bill and Elaine, who'd never done a vampire story before. We've got genre benders like Carolyn, who put ghosts in her mysteries, and P.N. who put mysteries into her vampire books. We've got up longtime successful fantasy writers like Chris and Tanya; and up and comers like Rachel, Tate, and Jeanne. And we've got me, who is as happy as a pig in clover to be be in this amazing company of NYT best sellers.

It just doesn't get any better than this. Unless, of course, we can get a group discount on those tombstones.

September 09, 2007

Sell Everything You Have and Travel

When I was a little girl, we got a postcard from my Aunt Ruth and Uncle Dick, who were traveling to England on their first trip abroad. It was a lovely London double-decker bus. When we flipped it over to see what they had to say, the enthusiastically scribbled note read, "Sell eveything you have and travel!"

I took that to heart, although I don't travel nearly as much as I would like to. (Children, work, committments...)

That said, I am just back from a lovely trip to southern Spain, visiting El Puerto de la Santa Maria, which is just south of Jerez, west of Cadiz -- and the city from whence Christopher Columbus packed his ships to sail off to America. It didn't rain once while I was there. In Madrid, which is in the middle of the central plain, it rained every day. The rain in Spain does fall mainly in the plain.

The whole country is a glorious place, but I am in love with the south -- all sunshine and wine, littered with pure sandy beaches and beautiful people.

I am not fluent in Spanish, having studied French in high school and Russian in college. However, I did make an effort to learn the basics -- anyone visiting another country owes this to themselves and to their hosts. I will brag that I got to the point where I could actually ask useful questions -- Next time I go I've already promised myself that I will also understand the answers when they come.

Lest anyone think this was a vacation, let me remind you that all writers are constantly on the lookout for places to bury bodies. I found several really good ones -- the Bodega in Jerez where Tio Pepe is made was one -- the smell of the different warehouses where each vintage is stored is as distinctive as a fine perfume. When the English first came to this region (just west of Gibralter) they struggled with pronouncing the city's name: Jerez is pronounced "Hereth" locally. Brits called it Sherry, which is where the local wines got their international name. I'd always thought Sherry was terribly sweet, but the wine actually has quite a lovely variety, and the one I sampled at the Bodega (warehouse) was crisp and light.

Then there was the house across the way from my cousin's home. A perpetual party in motion, I half expected to see Paris Hilton stroll down the street and enter their gate. The last morning I was there, the party went on so long that I woke up to the sound of their music and thought it was a clock radio. If I wasn't partially deaf, I would have loved to murder one of them for leaving the music on that loud all night long. As it was my cousins hadn't slept all night -- and still had to go to work that morning.

I also enjoyed seeing the horses there, as research for a young adult or children's book I'm longing to start. With my work through the US Pony Clubs, I've come to love horses' effect on children. Breathtakingly beautiful, Andalusians have a fluid gait and regal bearing. They are often used in films as they look like all horses ought to look. One night we went down to Sanlucar's beach, where they happen to run races two weekends during the summer. As someone more used to the American way of separating the runing horses from the crowds by quite a wide space, imagine my surprise when the race thundered by within mere feet of us -- and only a 2 foot tall orange plastic fence between us and the flying hooves. I was especially charmed by the betting booths the local children put up -- decorated cardboard boxes or folding tables. the barefooted children drag a line through the sand in the racecourse in front of their booth, and take bets. The horse crossing their line first during the race pays at their booth. Perfect inspiration for a writer wanting to move in a new direction.

Once in Madrid, I stayed in a lovely hotel up by the Real Madrid Football Stadium. (That's soccer for us Americans.) I got to see a small corner of the field from my hotel room, and watched a tiny protion of one game. I was astounded by the police presence around the stadium before the game. One rowdy group of fans warranted police escort -- four mounted on those lovely white Andalusians, and a platoon of them on foot. I was too far away to hear what they were chanting, but I decided that they must be the opposition as they wore red and Real Madrid's color is blue.

The museums of Madrid are beyond compare. I made the rounds of the Prado, the Reine Sophia, and somehow missed getting into the other grand museum due to an influx of tourists who made the line so horrible I couldn't stand there one more moment. (And yes, I'm fully aware that I too was a tourist, but at least I try to be polite when I don't understand things.) The botanical gardens are some of the best I've ever seen -- with loads of spots for young couples -- and old -- to snatch a bit of together-time. And loads of quiet spots to bury bodies. I kept thinking Korine and Amilou and Janey would love to go there someday. My last stop was the Archeological museum, which was fascinating. They run their exhibit chronilogically, fromt he basement on up from pre-human fossiles to present day Spain. The focus was on the civilizations which have influenced Spain -- and the exhibit was really well-done.

I have slides and if you'd like to come over, I'll even give you dinner once I get through the eleventh wheel or so. Happy traveling!

-j-

September 05, 2007

Using Real People

by Kris

Charlaine's recent blog (“The Chick in the Nest”) made me think about the real life people who’ve wandered into my fiction. I freely admit that real people have sparked a few of my characters. To my knowledge, they haven't influenced any novel protagonists, but they have gone on to star in a few of my short stories, not to mention turning up as failed killers and hapless victims. I actually regard getting to bump off and otherwise use people in print to be one of the perks of a mystery writer's job.

Consider a certain hairdresser, who, a number of years back, simply forgot that she left perm solution on my hair long enough to seep through my skull and melt my brain. During the year-and-a-half that it took for me to grow out her mistake, I spent more on conditioners than I did for my car. Though it's been some time now, I would probably harbor resentment against her still, had I not extracted my revenge in print ("Nothing Good Ever Came of a Bad Hair Day," Who Died in Here? - to be reprinted in my short story collection, The Rose in the Snow, coming in February '08). Now, thanks to that story, I’ve been purged of all toxic emotions and am able to move on. Even though the real woman is still out there somewhere, collecting a tidy tariff for destroying other people's hair, it gives me such a sense of well-being to know her fictional doppelganger has paid for her crime.

Or take the jerky guys in their monster pickup trucks, who think it's my responsibility to protect my car's fenders from them — they keep showing up in my stories as killers, only they're always too dumb to successfully carry out their crimes, as I'm sure they would be in real life as well. Driving defensively doesn't feel like such a burden when I know I'll get a story out of it, as well as a laugh at their expense.

And then there was a batty, albeit unusually rigid, woman on the periphery of my life at one time, who had the curious habit of insulting people out loud, to their faces, and then acting as if she hadn't said anything at all. Like those people who blurt insults through sneezes, only worse. Once when I went to her house for a party, she smiled and welcomed me, and then instantly spouted loudly to her husband, "Will you look at what she's wearing!" (I looked nice!) only to turn my way once more and warmly ask what I wanted to drink, as if that little exchange hadn't occurred at all. If I confronted her on one of her remarks, she'd insist she hadn't said anything. What are you going to do with someone like that, if not put them in print?

That woman came to inspire Charlotte Eaton, Drew's mother in Revenge of the Gypsy Queen, though her odd practice of simultaneously making and denying her boorish remarks didn't work as well in print, so I simply allowed her to be inadvertently rude in direct address.

And that's the thing about using real people — they evolve on paper, so while someone real might have inspired a character, the end product invariably experiences enough of a metamorphous as to be someone else entirely. A different back story emerges, and despite my determination to mercilessly extract my revenge, I come to understand why they are as they are, to empathize, and even sometime, to sympathize for the way life has shaped them.

Sometimes I even develop real, unexpected, affection for these characters. And yet, oddly enough, that does nothing to lessen the sense of triumph I experience for having created them. I derive such satisfaction from this practice, I'm unlikely to stop creating characters out of spite. People who irritate me still do so at their own peril.

September 02, 2007

OH MY!

Marlys

Being a cockeyed pessimist, I’ve always dreaded September, the beginning of the end of summer. The weather was anything but benign this summer up against the Rockies, nor were the spring and winter before it. Much of the country and world fared worse. Are things really going downhill that fast or am I just getting old? (That was rhetorical–don’t answer.)

When my kids were babies I’d lay awake nights worrying that the world, the weather, you name it, was heading for a chaos that would deprive them of a future. War, famine, disease, earthquakes, nukes–oh my. They’ve had their share of fortune and misfortune, but I’m proud of how they’ve handled both–well I’d worry less if they saved more–but . . . .

So, what’s this got to do with writing and writers? Well, like almost everyone we are deeply scarred by the real world and the people in it and shaped for that matter no matter how hard we’d like to deny it. We are not just ourselves and our characters and imaginations but our families, friends, neighbors. And most of us aren’t smugly comfortable with all this like the smugly rich. Which confuses me–the more monstrous the mansion the easier to drop missals on it. Surround it by a forest? Start a forest fire. Is it just the gullible who agonize over ominous prognostications? (I’ve always wanted to use that word.)

It’s been the beginning of the end all my life, way back to when my father was about to be drafted during WW 11. My parents are both gone now, lived to ripe old ages, and he never did go to war. It ended just in time, like a good story does after promising dire destruction. So I’ve decided the world will last long enough for me to polish up the book manuscript I’ve been working on, go to Switzerland, finish the short story I lost in computer hell and learn the quirks of my Dell Inspiron and survive the foibles of imminent weather change and the crash of the housing market. Maybe now all those lenders will quit insisting I sell my house or even worse, borrow money against it. The end of the world is right around the corner and has been my whole life. Yours too, you know. So enjoy while ye may. Actually, the end of the world started with Noah. Right? Or the snake in the Garden of Eden, or meteor showers or the Great Bang, comets colliding. We won’t even go into vengeful Mideast terrorists, religious fanaticism in every religion on the planet, probably even Buhdism by now.  Bottled water, plague, genocide, greed/poverty, nukes/ignorance in high places. Just don’t blame the lions and tigers and bears, oh my. They’re in real trouble. Enjoy now. It’s the only one you got.