It don't mean a thing if it ain't got that . . . swag

Catriona writes: I go to a pub quiz once a month on a Monday night. There are three real prizes - money-off vouchers for the pub we’re sitting in – and the fourth-place prize is swag donated by the contestants. In a town where John Lescroart, Eileen Rendahl, Andy Jones (poet) and I all live, write and do the pub quiz, the swag often includes books. But it’s the other stuff that’s the joy. Bill Clinton and family paper dressing-dolls, mindful cat colouring books, inflatable Einsteins . . . truly the non-book swag has nothing you need, but almost everything else.

So, as a connoisseur of pub-quiz swag, I’m delighted to have Cynthia Kuhn, author of the brilliant Lila Maclean college mysteries, here today to talk about the pressing question of author swag . . . and yes, readers, writers really do agonise over this.

Welcome, Cynthia!

A trip through the swag room of any mystery conference is Freebie Heaven. Many authors have come up with adorable and functional items to give away, like recipe cards or measuring cups for culinary cozies, seed packets and sunblock for gardening-related mysteries, and so on. I very much admire their creativity and ability to imagine thematically connected swag.

For The Semester of Our Discontent, I happily gave away bookmarks and pens. But when The Art of Vanishing launched, I vowed to come up with a new idea—something in the school arena since I write academic mysteries.

During my brainstorming session, I decided to make a list of authentic swag possibilities, items I’d actually encountered in or around a classroom. By the end, it looked like this:

1. Chalkboard/whiteboard covered in writing and no eraser in sight
2. Fresh wad of gum scraped from sole of shoe, stepped on in hallway
3. Indecipherable, abandoned lecture notes
4. Guilt-inducing stack of papers that must be carried around everywhere until graded
5. Random assortment of broken chalk nubs and nonfunctional dry erase pens
6. Coupon forgiving one late submission, already expired
7. Clump of paperclips unintentionally discarded from essays during grading frenzy
8. Projector that renders all letters into unreadable fuzzy blobs
9. Tiny stapler that only works properly on three or fewer sheets of paper
10. Book bag filled with incomplete homework assignments.

All of the above were promptly rejected, you’ll be glad to know. So what is on the new and improved list? Bookmarks and pens.

To help me when it comes round – as it will soon enough – to book three: What are some of your favorite swag items you’ve received?

---------------------

Cynthia Kuhn writes the Lila Maclean Academic Mystery series, which includes The Semester of Our Discontent and The Art of Vanishing. She teaches in Denver and serves as president of Sisters in Crime-Colorado.

For more information, please visit cynthiakuhn.net.

Comments

[Art Taylor]

Let me know if you decide to add "nonfunctional dry erase pens" back in.... I have plenty I can give you.

[Karen in Ohio]

Chocolates are good, but they tend to get eaten and forgotten.

After going to many book conferences, the things I've kept are bookmarks, of course, and small mouse pads, the very flat ones. They're great for taking on trips when the computer goes along. A little more expensive than a bookmark, though.

[Laura DiSilverio]

Such a funny post, Cynthia! So glad you decided not to give any of those items away. I stick with bookmarks. Perhaps you could give away gold stars? Keychains with the letters A,B,C,D and F for reviews posted on Amazon or Goodreads? Keychains or something else with Lila's college mascot attached? :-)

I love Lila! Keep on writing.

[Hank Phillippi Ryan]

SO funny! Reporter swag: broken pencils, ball points that don't work, notebooks with all the pages full. Used up AA batteries. Empty coffee cups. SO glamorous!

LOVE your book, though..xoxoo See you at Malice? We can go to the loot table together!

[Cynthia Kuhn]

Art, so kind of you! Grateful to have a resource. :)

Karen, that's a great suggestion! Much appreciated.

Those are most excellent ideas, Laura--thank you!

Ooh, the reporter list is terrific. Thank you, Hank, and YES to a Malice Loot Quest!

[Cynthia Kuhn]

Also...thank you so much for letting me visit today! (What a lovely introduction, Catriona!)

[catriona mcpherson]

Thank you for this great post, Cynthia. My favourite swag is still a bookmark. I leave them in read books marking favourite passages and so I go through them. But if anyone ever did post-it notes swag . . .

[Liz Milliron]

I'll see you a non-functioning dry erase marker and raise you a non-functioning wet erase marker. Remember those? I have one on my fridge you can have. LOL

[Clea Simon]

really fun post - thanks. I need some new ideas. Post-it notes, hmmmm

[Mark]

As much as that list made me laugh, I'm glad you decided against using any of that as promo.

[Kristopher]

Highlighters might be appropriate, Cynthia.

Also, what are the school colors? Not sure that has been mentioned in the books - Did I miss it? Forget? - but something using them would be clever.

Bookmarks will always be good - that's what I did for the blog as well. But gold star pins as mentioned above might be cute. Attached to an index card.

[Karen in Ohio]

Post-it notes are great! I still have some that came as swag (different industries) years ago, so they are good for advertisements.

Another one I thought about: Magnets. I can't bear to throw them away, so they tend to stick around. And they are not especially pricey to have made.

[Ritter Ames]

Anything related to 3M designed products makes me sit and say "Ooooooohhhhh." So, someday I hope to be successful enough to be able to give away Post-It or 3M pen/highlighter swag for my own books. But--hands down--the one item of swag I use nearly every day is a black cat jar opener that Kay Finch brought to Malice two years ago. It's just one of those thin black rubber jar openers (shaped like a sitting cat) to help give a grip when needed--and to keep her books in mind when I'm looking for new reads :)

[Cynthia Kuhn]

Catriona, I love bookmarks and post-it notes too! (And pens...oh how I love a new pen. Ridiculously much.)

Liz, wet-erase? HA! Nice. You are very generous to share.

Thank you, Clea. Would love to grab a ghost cat post-it!

Mark, that's good news. Appreciate the rejection confirmation! :)

Kristopher, those are all great ideas--thanks! The school colors are crimson and silver, and the mascot is the Silver Gryphon. *ponders*

Karen, nice--I hadn't thought of magnets. That's intriguing too.

Ritter, a black cat jar opener is so unique. So smart!

[H. Harra]

A pen that has a little flashlight in it; a rubber jar opener; a purse-size measuring tape; magnets; note or post-it pads -- I love all of these. My all time fav is an insulated lunch tote with the series logo and title on it that I use daily. People ask about it and I enjoy telling them about the books.

[Cynthia Kuhn]

Ooh, those are great! Thanks, H.