They All Ate and Were Satisfied

I’m struggling with a dilemma I never thought I’d face—what to serve at a book signing. Cheese? Wine? Cheese and wine? Sandwiches? Wraps? Chicken wings? What about dessert? Cookies? Cupcakes? Should I serve something nutritious? Fruit? Vegetables? Will I be stuck with a bunch of uneaten carrot sticks?

I don’t throw parties. It’s not that I don’t know how to hostess. I do. Make sure your guests are comfortable, well-fed, and well-hydrated. Especially those last two. Where I come from, people will talk about you (behind your back, of course) if you invite them over but don’t offer them something to eat and drink. You don’t have to serve a six-course, sit-down meal with a linen table cloth and the best china but you’d better at least offer some sweets and something other than water. Your guests may politely decline (and you may secretly hope they do) but to not offer is a cardinal hostessing sin. Serving something that’s “not quite right” (say, stale Ritz crackers you scrounged out of the back of the pantry and tap water in Dixie kitchen cups) may not earn you the dreaded label, “tacky,” if your guests think you “just didn’t know any better, bless your heart,” but the pitying look folks will cast in your direction as they glance at the contents of your shopping cart when they run into you at the grocery store forever after may be just as bad their scorn. It’s not that people are greedy or starving and see you as their only source of sustenance. Serving your guests decent food and drink shows you care about them. Your thoughtfulness signals you welcome them in whatever space you’re hosting them, whether it be your home or parish hall or rented venue, and you truly appreciate their coming to visit you or attending your event. (For those of you who think I’m exaggerating: My mother complained about the time she and some friends drove many miles to visit an acquaintance who neglected to offer them food during the visit and the long drive home on an empty stomach—fifty years after the fact. Granted, this was back in the day when African Americans couldn’t stop and eat at any restaurant they happened to pass—unless they were willing to deal with the humiliation of being served out back—so she and her friends were seriously hungry by the time they returned home but the ungraciousness of their hostess stuck with my mother half a century later as much the injustice of Jim Crow.)

I’ve got enough hostessing sense to ignore the advice of the person who suggested I "just pick up a cheese tray” in an off-hand manner. I can do better than “just a cheese tray”. My quandary is how much better should I do? Running out of food is not quite as bad as not serving any but a supreme hostess always has enough to be able to insist guests “take a plate” with them as they leave. Deciding how much is enough for extras without getting stuck with leftovers to feed the entire neighborhood for a week is a fine art. Since I don’t throw parties on a regular basis (I prefer the company of myself and my pet.), “how much” perplexes me. To complicate things more, this book signing is a drop-in, open-house style affair so I don’t know how many people to expect. Could be two, could be twenty. Martha Stewart, where are you when I need you?

I’m taking a cue from Jesus (seriously—take a closer look at the Bible and see how He comes through with food and drink. I want Christ to be my caterer.) at the wedding at Cana. I will have enough wine. Plenty of wine (four reds, four whites) means happy guests. It keeps, so leftover bottles won’t go to waste. (Don’t worry, I’ll have soft drinks, too.) I’m also going with cookies custom made at the local bakery. Judging by the Saturday morning crowd (and my own “taste-testing” *wink, wink* visits), the baked goods from Gerhard’s never miss. Leftovers, if there are any, will go to work with me the next morning. Finally, I’m serving a cheese and fruit tray, an antipasti tray, and deviled egg tray. Hors d’oeuvres easy to manage with a glass of wine in your hand. My guests may or may not buy a copy of one of my books—I hope they buy every copy I bring but I’m mentally prepared for the possibility of not selling any—but, regardless, they will feel welcome in the space to which I’ve invited them. And they won’t give me sad looks in the grocery store.

If you happen to be in the Chicagoland area tomorrow night, Wednesday, March 21, you’re invited. 6:30 pm at Lifeworking Coworking, 717 Forest Ave, 2^nd floor, Lake Forest, IL 60045. You won’t go hungry.

What are your favorite book signing snacks? What do you serve at your parties?

Comments

[Art Taylor]

I think it sounds like a great spread here! And wishing I was closer to Chicago. The wine is always key, I think--and Tara and I have made bourbon punch a couple of times (and then watched people literally tip the bowl to ladle up the last drops of it). Hope it all goes well!

[Hank Phillippi Ryan]

This sounds PERFECT! I've heard bookstores say--no chocolate! Since gooey chocolate tends to get on the books.

But you menu sounds great. I always get way too much food and wine...but hey, happy to take it home. It's a party, though, right? And you are celebrating your wonderful book on its first day into the world.

Cheers! And congratulations!

[Mark]

It depends on the book signing. I've been to plenty where nothing was offered. Usually for a book launch, there is food of some kind. But if it is just a regular book signing, snacks are completely optional.

Oh, and I'm the guest who will also go for the water. I don't drink alcohol (don't like the smell, so I don't want to taste it), and I only drink soda about once a month. Fruit juice is good, but I tend to stick with water.

[catriona]

If I wasn't going to Reno, I'd fly to Chicago for the devilled eggs alone. Gasping with giggles at you upgrading your hostess inspiration from Martha Stewart!